PERHAPS I AM A WITCH

CLAIRE 
Do the villagers really believe you’re a witch?

GEILLIE 
Aye. And perhaps they have reason to

I found myself with child, and knew soon, all would see,
And Arthur, my husband, the father couldnae be,

CLAIRE 
Why?

GEILLIE 
Because I had been adding bromide to his tea,
So you see, perhaps I ‘m a witch

Then at last week’s banquet, Arthur goes and dies,
And though everyone was shocked to me it was no surprise,

For recently, when cooking, I’ve put arsenic in his pies,
So you see, perhaps I’m a witch

Folk used to say I tried,
To turn a frog into a prince,
But the spell proved too difficult, I found,
But then I married Arthur,
And that helped to convince,
That I’d managed it the wrong way round.

CLAIRE 
Geillie, you’re terrible. But did you really have to kill him?

GEILLIE 
I’m afraid I did

I needed his money, so I forged Arthur’s hand,
Ten thousand pounds I’ve sent, for the army he’ll command,

CLAIRE 
Who?

GEILLIS 
The rightful King who’ll reclaim this, my beloved land,
You see, I’m a patriot, not a witch

CLAIRE 
A Jacobite

GEILLIE 
For you see I’m a Jacobite, not a witch